Toilets around the world pt56 – Hotel Christian IV, Copenhagen. Denmark

While Britain is still a member of the EU, your intrepid reviewer is exercising her right as an EU citizen to live, work and perform ablutions in 27 other EU counties. Prior to flying here on Easyjet (see Toilets Around the world pt14) your reviewer dined on ‘Special’ chilli chicken and broccoli. This combined with the countless cups of black coffee your reviewer has drunk since getting up at 0400 to catch a flight means that she is busting for a Michael Gove.
The toilets in this hotel have a spartan feel to them. Not Scandinavian minimalism, rather Hertfordshire County Council school building projects of the 1970s. Petrol blue linoleum carpets the floor and the sink is worn from age. The toilet is both low and low tech, but at least it is clean. Having had that large Michael Gove, your reviewer wipes her Boris with the kind of toilet paper that you used to find in pound shops, before Sterling devalued and it became too expensive for pound shops to stock. She then washes her hands on a bar of soap that lathers as easily as Jew baiting comes to Jeremy Corbyn. Your reviewer then goes off look at the headlines in a Danish newspaper and have a cry for her beloved country.

As reviewed by Donna Biggun


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